Three men went out for a night on the town, one had too much to drink and was forced to take a cab home.

A homeless guy gets done with his daily work. where does he go? nowhere he is homeless...

Q. Why couldn't the blind black guy read. A. He's Dead

Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium BATMAN! Oh cemetery jokes

Why didn't the boy get his mom anything for her birthday? He was killed by a drunk driver years ago

Q: How to fit 10 babies in a suitcase? A: By blender Q: How to get the babies out of the suitcase? A: Using a straw.

What are the last words of a child dieing of cancer ? Nothing because he is to ill to speak

- Mom, you have a banana in you ear. - What?

Q: Hey, wanna hear a joke? A: Sure! Q: Alright, cool. *leaves*

knock knock whos there steve i dont know you go away

Why don't Vikings read the New York Times? Because they all died centuries ago. And none of them live in New York.

What did the Joker say to Batman? Why are we wearing these stupid costumes

How do you kill a blond? Put a scratch and sniff at the bottom of a pool.

Help i have fallen and i cannont get up Life alert life alert To bad just sit there we dont care

Q:What's better than getting 500 million dollars A:Nothing

Did you hear the one about the bus driver? Me neither

Knock knock. Who's there? ... Damn knick knockers.

Why does beonce say to the left, to the left. she doesnt she sings it.

What do you call an arabic man who sells bombs for a living? A business man.

When life gives you lemons, you probably just found lemons.

A man walks into a bar. He says ouch.

Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? He was shot in the back, knifed in the face, kicked in the groin, poo'd on by an alpaka, had frogs stapled to his face, his hair burnt off, pushed off a cliff, eaten by a scorpian, lost his arms legs and eyeballs, squashed by a hippo, ran over by a buss, truck and cement mixer, had cement poured on his frogs (that were stapled to his face), became morbidly obese, was raped by a chicken, was served as sauce at an italian resturant, was done by his mother's father's grandson, broke both of his detatched legs, crashed his car, went into a time machine and was crushed by a stegosaurous, had a lemon squesed in his detatched eyes, got high on cokeawana, was crushed to death by a garbage disposer and was rejected by the hobo at the shelter? no, actually, he tripped

Q what do you do when your friend tells you hes a homosexual A. you tell him that you will accept him and can still be very good friends

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? I don't know. It depends how high the light is.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...