What's worse than losing the remote? Dying of cancer.

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Bear walks into bar and says to eagle may I have a................... drink eagle says why the long pause hohahahohahahohaha

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Help i have fallen and i cannont get up Life alert life alert To bad just sit there we dont care

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I asked god for a bike but i know he doesn't work like that so i stole a bike and asked him for forgiveness

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What did the man say to the young, blond athletic girl walking by? "Hi."

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What did one cannibal say to the other while they were eating a clown? Well, I couldn't understand them... It's hard to pronounce anything clearly when your mouth is full, which is why you don't eat and speak simultaneously.

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what do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch names

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A man walks into a bar. He says ouch.

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What happened to the guy who bought a nice, brand new, plasma screen t.v.? He hanged himself.

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Why is the deer afraid of the hunter? Because he doesn't want to get shot.

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Kevin stinks signed Taggart. Is this how you do it!!!

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a man and a boy walk into a dark scary wood. "gosh I'm spooked" exclaimed the boy. "you think you've got it bad?" said the man "I'm walking out of here alone"

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What's the difference between 31 dead hookers and a Lamborghini? One is a traumatizing tragedy that left at least 31 poor families mourning for their loved ones, whom were only trying to make a living in what is a terrible economy and were unable find a better job, and the other is an overpriced sports car.

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Aww good to see you looking positive! He said to the boy dying of HIV

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1: Knock Knock? 2: Who's There? *runs*

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on a scale from 0 to 100, how childish are you? 69

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Q: What did the pony say when it had a sore throat? A: "I have throat cancer and only have six weeks to live."

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Red are roses, blue are violets I'm dislexic.

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A horse walks into a bar, it is then frightened and bucks a man in the chest. Animal control and an ambulance are promptly called. The horse is then taken to a stable, while the man is taken to the hospital where he later made a full recovery.

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what is red and can grow hair water i lied about it growing hair and that it is red

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Q: There was a cinnamon bun and a cow out flying, one of them fell.. who? A: The cinnamon bun because cinnamon bun's can't fly.

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roses are red, violets are blue. sunflowers are yellow, i bet you were expecting something romantic but no this is just gardening facts.

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What's grey and can't fly? A parking lot.

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Don't tell anyone, the Health Department is already on our backs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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