What did the man say to his wife before she made him a sandwhich? Do your job and make me a sandwhich.

What trees do fortune tellers look at? Whichever variety of species are indigenous to where they live.

there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

-What's long, hard and full of semen? -Since this is a play on words both an erect penis and a naval submarine could apply here

Why was the boy crying? he was so happy his mom bought him a playstation 3

What did Washington say to California? WC

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

Racial Equality

womens rights

Q. Why do televisions come with clickers A. So you don't have to get up to change the channel

a man walks into the bar and say, OUCH!!

are you saying pam, or pan?

what do you call a polar bear in a bathtub? No soap, radio

What did the white man say to the group of black men when there was a golf ball coming at them? Stay there! You are in no immediate danger!

Why didn't the black man make it into heaven? No one did, there is no evidence supporting the existence of an afterlife.

Have you read Shakespeare? Dunno. Who wrote it? Shakespeare.

A seal walks into a club. The man proceeds to skin it and sell the fur for profit.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The first is a person of the Jewish Faith and the other is a popular item of food.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7, 6's boss, has been sexually assaulting 6 for years at work, but 6 needs the money too bad to say anything or quit his job.

A girl talks to here boyfriend about collage. What is his responce? Nothing. No one talks about college.

Why did the bear eat a group of children? It was hungry.

What's the one good thing about being a paraplegic? Nothing.

A Mexican man, an American man, and an Italian man go to a bridge. The mexican said "we have too much of this in our country!" and throws pasta into the water. The Mexican man says "we have to much of this in out country!" and throws a taco into the water. The American throws in the Mexican man and says "we have to much of these in our country!"

so how about that irline food

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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