Why didn't Tom have to pay for his ride to the funeral? Because he was dead and in a coffin.

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What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Sex

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? HE WAS DEAD STUPID IDIOT.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was died...

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George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

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Who was sorry when the fat kid fell over last year? The whole of Japan.

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Why did Sarah fall of the swing... She had no arms. Knock knock, who's there... Not Sarah. Face Face, who's there... Probably Sarah.

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Why did the kid trip over the rock? Because he was diagnosed with serious autism, and might die soon.

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What happens when a women becomes pregnant? She gives birth to a child 9 months later.

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How did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it died. how did the second monkey fall out of the tree? because it was stapled to the other monkey.

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Why did the chicken cross the road. ... It didn't.

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why did javonne choose club getaway madonna wanted to foster

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Why is Adam saying numbers? He is a maths teacher.

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"Solids tunderf" he said, while chewing his gum.

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A Jew ran into a wall with a boner. He broke his nose first.

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Q.How do you get a dog to meow ? A. Put the dog in the freezer overnight . . Get a chainsaw and run it along his back in the morning . " Meowrrrr..."

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A joke.

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Roses are red, my binoculars are blue. When your window's open, i'm watching you.

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Do I ever ask yo a question that I havn't given you the answer to Mr Hearty.

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There is a bomb. It blows up and kills 26 people.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farm he was from was near a road. There was a hole in the fence and the chicken got out. He then started wandering and happened to cross the road.

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What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Nothing, penguins haven't evolved a complex form of language.

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Bro my d*ck is like 20 inches. That's not healthy, an erection that big will deprive your brain of too much blood and kill you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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