What's the difference between a Pile of Dead Babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamboghini in my garage

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Roses are red Violets are blue Get in the shed I'm gonna screw you

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What does a fish say when it swims into a wall? Damn

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? Because he has no arms.

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What do you call a bunch of Cubans on a boat in the Gulf of Mexico? A guy who just so happens to own a boat and is on a fishing trip with his buddies. -Mitch Hastings

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Hey did you hear the one about the pizza oven? No.

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-What did George Clooney say to Jennifer Lawrence? -"Hi!"

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a dog and a duck went out for a meal they both ordered lobster and enjoyed the night.

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A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

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one time someone wrote an anti-joke, hoping for lots of likes, which give one a sense of validation. nope.

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Say this really fast. Ice Bank Mice Elf It'll take a while for dumbasses to understand.

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Ring Ring! Hello? Hello, is your refrigerator running? Yes it is Good.

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What does it mean when you see a bunch of blacks running in one direction? That you need to be more specific.

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have u ever have to clean up ur own poop? me niether.

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Hey can you turn Tmartn upI can't hear him

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Why did the man punch the women? I don't know, but he served jailtime

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Here isa poem from a dog Roses are gray violets are a different shade of gray Let's go chase cars

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1234567890? ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ

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Your mom's so dumb she has cancer...... oh wait that's racist

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Knock Knock Who's there? I eat mop I eat mop who? That's strange, most American's don't eat poo I'm Asian

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Why was the boy running There was a giraffe chasing him

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Teacher: which vegetable makes your eyes water? Student: Any vegetable. Teacher: How? Student: Just rub any vegetable in your eyes and see what happens.

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There once was an old man. He had worked hard his whole life to make sure his children got everything they needed, and that they were always happy. He had a beautiul life and a great big house with a marvelous view of the ocean. In time his kids moved away, and his wife died. The old man was left all by himself in the great big house, and sometimes the emptiness of the house reminded him of the emptiness of his own heart. He very seldom cried though, and kept all of his emotions inside. One day it all became to much for him and he took his own life in the silence of his great big empty house. I was that ocean.

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What do you call a girl with no legs? Disabled

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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