What Did The Farmer When He Lost His Tractor? "Wheres my Tracto?"

What do you call a dog with no legs? A dog with no legs

Roses are blue, Violets are red, I have down syndrome, my favorite color is potato

Whats Black and White and Red all over? A penguin in a blender.

There once was a man from Dundee, Whose Limericks ended on line three. I don't know why.

How did the Jewish husband and stay together forever? They didn't. They ended up in divorce like 50% of all other married couples due to irreconcilable differences.

What if the rest of you value something wrong?

I pulled a disabled girl in the pub last night. The handle on her wheelchair was caught in my jacket.

What's the difference between a blonde and a carrot? One's a human, the other's a vegetable.

what do call a purple animal that eats rocks? A purple rock eater..

Why did Hitler shoot himself? Because he found out Chuck Norris was a Jew.

Ellen: Knock knock Steve: Who's there? Ellen: Banana Steve: Banana who? Ellen is offline and can't receive messages right now.

Knock, knock. Who's there? The IRS.

A man walked into a bar, therefore beginning a lifetime of alcoholism that would slowly tear his family apart.

A small boy is playing on the sidewalk. Then, he is approached by a black van. The boy gets in the van, and the van drives away. Then, the man driving the van says, "So, how was your day, son?"

How many light bulbs does it take to garner an unnecessarily large crowd of a single ethnic group of people working together to simultaneously replace said light bulbs and uphold their cultural stereotypes? What the hell's a light bulb? I'm a culturally illiterate Amish man.

Why did the pregnant Mexican cross the border? Nobody knows. She was shot down on site.

Sometimes I sit in the bath and pretend im a bubble

How did the black guy, get a nice car, house, and attire? He went to college, and got a job.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven's dad owned a shot gun.

Why did Jack take a prune out for the evening? A healthy snack as part of a balanced diet.

What did the pedophile say to the delightfully curly-headed youth? If I can't have you, I'm going to shoot you through the nails with a nail gun.

Last words of a redneck - "Hold my beer and watch this"

A man walks into a bar and sees two girls making out. He orders a drink and leaves.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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