Why did the Muslim man get on a plane? Because he was going on vacation

Thankgiving Jimmy: I'm thankful for my family Thomas: I'm thankful for shelter Jake: I'm thankful for running over babies

A man walks into a bar. He drinks then comes home to his whole family murderd and mutilated

What did the little gril with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Cancer

What's brown and slimy? brown slime

Q: how many babies does it take to paint a house red? A: It Depends on how hard you throw them

How do you make a person laugh? Tell a good joke How do you make them cry? Tell a sad story How do you make them cry and laugh at the same time? Tell a bad joke

A teacher tells one of her students, "If I say 'I am beautiful', which tense is that?" The student tells her, "Didn't your mother ever tell you that lying is bad?"

Whats big, round and orange? A big round orange

Yo momma so fat she decided to have lipo suction

Who stole the cookies from the cookie jar? Who me? Couldn't be.

What's brown and sticky? A stick

Why can't a blonde swim? Because in this economy her parents never took her to a pool in which she could get swimming lessons and practice to be able to be a good or maybe great swimmer.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

Hey babe, are you a refrigerator? -No... Good--'cause I wanna f*ck you so hard. Best pickup line. Always works.

How do you make a nerd cry? Give him a 99% on a test.

What does it mean when people say your mom? it means that there name is Hunter

Why did the Japanese piliot crash into the ship? Because he has motion sickness and puked all over the wind shield making it so he can't see.

What's the color of a healthy kidney. I have no f***ing idea.

– Hello. Is this a laundry? – Yes, it is a laundry.

Why was the cat meowing at the chicken? Because Sally got hit by a fridge.

so an apple walks into a bar... I'm terrible at making jokes...

Men's rights Because its an anti-joke

Why is Jordan Abu Arabian ? Because his mom is!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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