Two women were sitting quietly.

What Mistake Do Ghosts make? None ghosts dont exist..

What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

fridge

Knock knock Who's there Police, there's been an accident Oh really? Know i'm actually a serial rapist and i have a gun so open up

why did the chicken cross the road because on the other side his wife that he had loved for years was being tortured and he was trying to save her life.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What's the difference between a gay person and a Nazi? No gay person systematically murdered 6 million people.

What's big and red and if it falls out of a tree and can kill you - a fire truck

What the did the man say to his boss? You are my boss.

Why didnt jimmy go to school? He had a hangover

Yo mama has had so many kidney stones she has to be on a water diet.

How do you make a frog stand still? Shoot it.

What did batman say to robin before they got into the batmobile? Get in the batmobile.

How many Lepers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? People with leprosy should not be doing general house keeping.

What is the difference between a brick and a ginger? The entirety of their chemical make up and physical appearance.

What's worse than getting your dog neutered? You being the dog.

Why was the guy coverd in garbage. I don't know but their are a lot of homeless people that can't afford the good stuff.

A man walks into a bar. He orders a beer.

My girlfriend wanted to talk about her feelings ... SO I TOLD THAT BITCH THAT... i really loved her and care about her feelings

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the cross light said signal said "GO"

What's scarier than a ghost? Ur mum.

You're always working, why don't you spend some time with your daughter? be a good father. But i already am. We're sleeping together while you work every night.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side Why did the duck cross the road? I don't know. I only know why the chicken crossed the road.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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