Roses are brown, Violets are brown, WHO THE HELL $#!T IN MY GARDEN?!

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What's black, white, and red all over? Something that's black, white, and red all over.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms or legs.

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How do you make pie without the oven? I dont kow, go google it.

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Yo momma's so ugly. Most people do not enjoy looking at her

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Why did the dog in Detroit die in the street? It was stabbed.

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roses are red, violets are blue, {insert name here} is f**ked up, (s)he want to have sex with you

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What do you call a black priest? "Father" if you are Christian.

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Knock Knock Who’s there? Tom Tom who? Tom Pearson? Oh Tom, I wasn’t expecting you til 3pm, please come in.

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Some people devote their to talking in their head. Jesus christ.

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I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

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what is 1 plus 1 i don't know ask your teacher

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Whats hard and long? An erect penile shaft.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get KFC... Because hes a canibal!

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Why are kenyans so fast? Because due to evolutionary changes, people from that area of the world have evolved to have superior muscle builds to sprint, hence giving them a natural advantage against an equally trained athlete form another part of the world with an equal skill level

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"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "A door to door salesman. Are you unsatisfied with the way your dish soap handles your plates? Then I have the product for you!" "I'm not interested in your product, but thank you anyway." "No problem. On an off note, how did you hear me? I didn't speak very loudly when I said knock knock, and I didn't even bother to knock on the door or ring the doorbell." "I have really good hearing." "Oh, okay. And for future reference, maybe you should open the door when talking to a visitor. Then body language gets established and the conversation flows more nicely that way." "That's some good advice, and I'll take it. Thanks, salesman." "You're welcome. On to the next house."

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A white man, a black man and an asian walked into a bar. They got a drink and discussed multiple issues of the day and then went their seperate ways home.

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woman..parallel parking

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CORRECTION TO THE COMMENT BELOW! Its a WIN/WIN/WIN/WINWINWINWINWINWIN (WIN For at least 30 more minutes)/CUUUUM!/"SORE ASS WHINING CHILD Gonna grow into a slut SITUATION!" friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man The Anti-Christ: Do not thumb me down unless you want to feel the big burning hot spear of darkness, and you do not... You better don`t be or become a sore ass kid you allshole if you know what I am saying... Yeah! Thats right! You better fear me! Because the angrier you look... The more offended you become... The better you are starting to look...

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Q: How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? A: None. Woodchucks have herbivorous diet mainly consisting of wild grasses, berries, as well as agricultural crops when they are available.

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Why Tom is Gay ? Because brocoly didnt eat a mashroom .

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I really want to wear my Christmas leggings Actually I lied about the leggings, they're tights I love anal

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Hitler, a Nazi, and a Jew walk into a bar. Only Hitler and the Nazi walk out. What happened to the Jew? He had to use the bathroom so he asked Hitler and his Nazi friend to wait in the car.

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Why did the little girl miss 7 straight days of school? She died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops