What type of party do you throw when your fat? A baby shower.

Two tomatoes are crossing the road. Suddenly one of them gets hit by a car. He goes "AGH!"

A Cheerio is at Cheerio high school, and there is another Cheerio that he wants to ask to the prom, but she is a frosted Cheerio and because of Cheerio social statuses she would not go with him. So he goes to the Cheerio factory so he can become a frosted Cheerio. The factory workers tell him that he can be a frosted Cheerio, but the machines are malfunctioning today and they can only frost half of him. He agrees, and the girl Cheerio goes to the prom with him. He shows up at the prom with her, and she asks him to get her some punch. So, he's walking around, looking for the punch line, when he realizes: There isn't any.

Why did Biggie Smalls eat so much dark chocolate? His doctor suggest that he eat foods high in fiber.

roses are red violets are blue a pyschorapist just ate me refrigerator

Why was the boy's face red? He put his cat in a blender.

Why didn't the little boy hear the ice cream truck? He was deaf.

What do you call a blonde prostitute your bitch

Why did the man pull out his chainsaw? To get rid of a tree in his front yard.

There are 3 guys named:Poop, Shut up and Manners. They all were speeding down the street, they took a sharp turn and Poop fell out of the back. A cop pulled them over while Manners got out to go get Poop. The cop says, "whats your name." "Shut up." "No seriously whats your name." "Shut up" he says a little bit harsher. "Wheres your manners?" the cop says. "Back there picking up Poop."

A Mexican walks into Taco Bell, because it is the only restaurant within walking distance of his workplace.

Why were there a series of riots in london? The police shot and killed a man who was threatening them and thus caused his friends to get angry and caused other people to lose control.

Why did the asian lady buy the large shirt instead of the medium? Because the medium didn't fit

knock knock whos there? police police who? police your house is on fire and your kid just died from broncitisand i just farted and u get a tickit because u answered the door naked

there's a blonde and a brunette jumping out of a plane, what one hits the ground first? they both hit at the same time because gravity pulls everything down towards the earth at the same pace

i told my parents that i was having friends come over my dad said great my mom said great so i said great

A man walks into a bar. The man says,"ouch, how could I have not seen the bar."

Why did a Jewish man have no hair left? He recently got a haircut.

why do gingers have no friends? They are non sentient stems that are simply not capable of interacting with intellectual humans

A jumpercable walks in the bar the bartender says ill get you something but dont start anything.

Why is the chicken afraid of the tiger? Chickens are inferrior to tigers and could easily be eaten.

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

What's funnier than 10 dead babies? 11 dead babies.

why couldn't sarah ride the bike? She had cerebral Palsy

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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