why didn't the boy get any presents for his birthday? because when his dad went to the store to get him some presents he ended up buying presents for himself like a huge douchebag.... and the apple doesn't fall from the tree so his son is a douchebag too and doesn't deserve presents.

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What green and has wheels? grass I lied about the wheels

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Whats worse than a fart joke? A queef joke.

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Why did the Mexican jump of the roof? Because he had a serious meth addiction that was destroying his family and he could not live with the awful things he did to get his fix.

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Yo mama so fat , when she went to the doctors office and stepped on the scale they said please, your weight, not your phone number .

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koala's try to hit on teddy bears...... desperate even though we know extinction's comin

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Stoner Student: "Imagine if El Nino and La Nina got together and started a family and had little Los Ninos." Class Nerd: "Yeah."

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What do you call a person trying to rob a store with no arms? Peter Pan

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whats the differnce between a cadilack and a pile of dead babies? theres no cadilack in the back of my car1 >.>

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wots brown and smells like shite shite

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you walk into a bar Griffin: 'are you ok'

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Roses are red and i like Pie but seriously, i don't care if you die

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im not food

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What do you call Bilbo Baggins when you use him for pleasure? Dildo Baggins

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What do you do when a taco eater gives you guacamole? Thank him, and politely smash it in the face of the nearest trashy tourist.

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why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a room? This is impossible as dead babies are incapable of achieving such a feat.

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What happened when man put a dog in the blender? He got arrested for Animal abuse

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Q: How do you stop a rhino from charging? A: Shoot it.

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What did the American WWII soldier say to the Feudal-era samurai? Nothing, because the two lived on completely different continents and in completely different time periods.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Hatch. Hatch who? God bless you.

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What do an elephant and a grape have in common? They're both purple... except for the elephant.

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why did the window washer lose his job. because he fell off and died.

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Q: Why did your mom cross the street? A: Because she was so ugly that she fell off both sides of the bed

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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