How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Why did the chicken cross the road ? To get to the other side . Unfortunately , there was a car accident and shrapnel from the explosion [caused by gas on fire] cut his head off causing the old woman to faint , and later die a horrible death .

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Q-what did the black man say before he crossed the road? A-i wanna cross the road.

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whats the difference between you're mom and you're dad none there both the same

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whats black and white and covered in blood Michael Jackson being stabbed

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A white, black, and Hispanic man walk into a bar at 2:00 in the morning. Unfortunately the bar closed at midnight, so they were charged with breaking and entering, and were sentenced to 2 years in prison.

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What's the difference between a guitar and a fish? Fish are living organisms and guitars are instruments used for people's entertainment

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was persecuted for his faith.

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Roses are red Violets are blue classic

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A dyslexic man walked into a bra.

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What's blue and can't sing? Blue.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He didn't. He threw at the girl, and that's why she fell off the swing.

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why was the boy sad his whole family just died in a plane crash

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Why little Susie often molested as a child? She was probably a good-looking child.

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anti jokes are gay...your all gay

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fjasdklfjklasdjfasdfk .... sorry i have terets!

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what did the bee do when bill tried to slap it it stung bill and died.

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Why didn't the boy blow out his birthday cake this year? He died last year.

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why did the man fall? cuz he jumped from a building

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(joker) Do you like fishsticks? (recipient) "No" (any response from the joker at this point qualifies as anti joke)

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roses are red violets are blue , but i would't know that because u never bring me flowers, you bastard .

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Why did nobody like the famous singer? Because she was Rebecca Black.

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what did the man say to his boss? Hello boss

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What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table has legs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops