Roses are Red Violets are Purple Not blue

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Q:If an apple and an orange had a politicial debate, what would it concern? A:Nothing important.

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Yo mama has had so many kidney stones she has to be on a water diet.

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What makes a good jack-o-lantern? A pumpkin

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Want to hear a joke? Justin Bieber's talent.

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Joke.

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A woman walks into a doctor's office and says "Doctor, my water just broke." The doctor replies "Get off my carpet."

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An irish man stumbles out of a bar.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers The third one is for you

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What happens when you click a link on a web page offering sex? You get a virus.

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holy F**k someone call an ambulance!

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What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong WALKS on the moon. Michael Jackson rapes little boys

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Hey, I'm Schrödinger, and this is crazy! But here's a sealed box... the cat lives, maybe...

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Whats the similairity between a dog and a cat? They're both cats, except for the dog.

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A dog, a cat, and a a fish were having a conversation while their owners were away. Ashton Kutcher is a murderer.

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What happened when the chicken crossed the road? I got feathers stuck in my cars grill

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Q.why is there so much drama? A.it's a reality tv show.

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Doctor, I am afraid of getting sexually abused. Hmm, sounds serious, take off all your clothes so we can get a proper look.

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Why was the black man eating fried chicken and watermelon? He was at home

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What did the child molestor do? He went home and molested children.

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Do you know the muffin man? No

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

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Q: Why did the mom try to wake up a sleeping bag? A: Because it's morning and her kid is curled up inside fast asleep

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Did you hear about the german girl who had sex and died................. it was 50 years later after she had a family of about five kids and lived a happy life as a nurse

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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