Knock knock. Who's there? Me. Oh.

What do Michael Jackson and a T-Rex have in common? They're both dead.

Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: "There goes my income. I dont know how I'll support my family now, or keep my crops alive."

Why did the dinosaur cross the road? It didn't.

A man walks into a bar.. and has a bomb strapped to his chest

Why was there no girl on the swing set? She decided to get off of the swings.

Your momma soo fat.... that if she doesnt start exercising and eating right she will be more likely to get adult onset diabetes.

Guess what Timmy got for Christmas, Nothing, Timmy has no parents, he's an orphan.

You know what's sad and Funny? When a guy walks into a gay bar and doesn't get hit on.

Why were two black men fighting for a dollar that fell on the floor? Because they both lost their homes in the crashing market and have to care for their ill children that need money for medical expenses.

What happens when you turn the TV on? You watch it.

Q:Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A: A terrorist threw a refrigerator at him then slapped the ice cream out of his hand

A- 2 jews walk in a bar..what happed? B- they died 35 years later from skin cancer

Why does the boy like ice-cream? It tastes good.

What does the ship say when it's cold? Shiver me timbers

What did the jew say to hitler? SURPRISE!! IM YOUR NEW DADDY

Q. Where's your nan???? A. In my closet

How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at him.

Why was the blonde so dumb? She had a severe case of dyslexia, which made it difficult to study.

Homeless man....it's what's for dinner!

What's the difference between ten dead babies and a Ferrari? There's no Ferrari in my garage.

What happened to the girl who got an abortion? She got an infection.

Why did Lil' Susie leave her blue rain boots at home? Because she had stumps for legs. To attempt to wear them would only hurt her emotionally.

Did you know, every time you close your eyes, a ghost appears. Once you open your eyes it disappears. PROVE I'M WRONG!?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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