Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poetry, Show me your tits.

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Why did the dog cross the road? Because he saw another dog

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why was the boy sad his whole family just died in a plane crash

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what is the opposite of underpants? overpants

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How do you make a clown shut up? Throw a axe at it!!

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What's big and messy? A big mess

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So my friend told me to go shot myself I got my Canon and shoot myself The image came out very clean and profession.

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What did the stick of butter say to the lemon? "I'm a stick of butter"

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Knock, Knock Come in

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Why did Tim fall out of the window? Well... he didn't exactly fall... I pushed him

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Q: How many burgers did little Johnny eat? A: Involuntary erections.

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How did the chewy cross the road ? it was stuck to the chickens foot.

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The Walmart Scooterwhale (Terracetus obesitus) is the only member of the cetacean family to live in a terrestrial environment. Commonly found in large-scale grocery stores all across North America, it subsists mostly on fattening junk food, microwave popcorn, and beer.

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There was an apartment. At the bottom level lived a white family, The 2nd level, there was a mexican family, and the 3rd level, there was a Black family. Someone blew up the apartment with a bomb, WHO SURVIVED? The white family, because the parent were at work and the kids were at school.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He did not have sufficient stability in his arm at that moment causing him to loosen his grip and drop his ice cream.

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Why did the booger throw a fit? Because it was getting picked on.

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The one under this is a fake. i wrote the real one

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had gotten out of its coop.

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A woman sees a sign on a store that says "husbands for sale." Curious, she walks inside. The clerk says "These men will be perfect husbands, they'll cook and clean for you and see to your every need." Shocked, the woman calls the police and reports the store for human trafficking.

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How many black basketball players does it take to change a lightbulb? One. They're all rather tall therefore they can reach the light source with ease.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Run it over with a lawn mower!

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How many apes does it take to put in a light bulb 3

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Allah walked into AK Bar

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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