How do you confuse a blond? Paint your self green and throw forks at her.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What could be happier than a fat guy eating 20 pies? The guy he bought it from!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call a black guy who works at McDonald's? A worker, you racist piece of shit!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's 18 inches long and makes women scream? Crib death.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call an elephant mixed with a rhino? A freak.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are red violets are purple what the hell happened to your ugly face

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way. ernkso

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the guy fall into the ocean? He was surfing

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why was the little boy bald? Because he had leukaemia

thumb_up thumb_down +6

"knock knock" "who's there" *no answer* Opens door to find dead wife lying on doorstep with 'lol' stamped on forehead

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Knock Knock. who's there? James. well use the doorbell.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

There was this girl who suffered for her whole life and then she died. It was very liberating.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's the difference between a panda and a baby? I don't have a baby in my freezer

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Whats worse than getting an eye gouged out? Getting both eyes gouged out?

thumb_up thumb_down +4

have you seen stevie wonder's harmonica? neither has he.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why are black people so good at basketball? Hard work and dedication

thumb_up thumb_down +4

a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Who in Tyrone's black family gave him presents on christmas? Not his dad.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A man walks into a bar. He says ouch.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why is it so hard to find slim fitting clothes in America? Because not many clothing stores carry them.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you get if you cross a fairy cake with some boiled parsnips? Fladgemuffin

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun! So I KILL YOU!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

The blonde, brunette and,the red headed girls were at a store. When the blonde says......... im tired let's leave.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops