What did the hooker say to the black guy? How long do you want it for?

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't, a car ran him over.

A black person goes up to the drive through at popeye's, what did they say? Nothing, it was closed.

Bigfoot, the loch ness monster, and self-respecting Justin Beiber fans are all the same, your told they exist, it's not true.

why did the pyromaniac burn down the house? because he is a pyronaniac, he derives pleasure from burning things.

there were two cyclists cycling down a main road in china at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace, one being chinese and the other irish. why did the irish man get stopped and the chinese man not? because the irish man had in fact raped and murdered a young child in his native home town and then fled the country to china.

Why couldn't the kitten drink its milk? Because its owner was neglecting him and the kitten later died of malnurisment

knock knock Goodbye

Knock Knock The occupant uses their peephole and realizes it is a familiar face then proceeds to let them in.

There are two types of people in this world, those that can't count

Why is 6 so afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered six offender.

Whats worse then sneezing on someone? sneeze on someone and find out

Knock Knock. You don't have a door.

What's worst than finding a worm in your apple Finding half a worm in your apple .....

'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, But the very next day, I died.

Wanna hear the most repeated joke on anti jokes? Why did [insert name here] fall off the swing? Because he/she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not [insert name here].

Why did Jimy fell down the stairs, because he was adopted.

Who is the most vile man in Britain? Jerry Carr, the guy who works at the casino.

Why didn't bob like night clubs? He was epileptic

How many teachers would it take to find their way out of a maze? Depends on their area of speciality. If the teacher(s) are mathematicians or logicians, probably one or two at most. If they are home economics teachers, possibly more.

How did leatherface cut a tree when he lost his chainsaw? He just asked a friendly neighbor to borrow him a axe

A Japanese Nuclear Scientist goes to the swimming pool, and buys a ticket. He went to the changing rooms and proceeded to have a lovely bit of exercise, which helped him burn off the calories from his carbohydrate based luncheon.

What happens when your dog is bad? A crying dog who has to sleep in the BACKYARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Stupid dog....

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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