What did the elephant say to the naked man? "Cute, cute, but can it pick up peanuts?"

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Why did the plane crash? Because the engine wasnt working.

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Did you hear about the three black guys who got run over by a car? No? Neither did Ray Charles!

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What does a homeless man get for Christmas? A gun to kill himself with

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golf is so gay i mean look at what they name the different clubs 3 wood 4 wood 5 wood 6 wood just give it a beat and you got a catchy song

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First speaker: "why are there so many anti-jokes about something walking into a bar!?!? Second speaker: "there are only a couple thousand of them." First speaker: "it is getting so damn annoying!" Second speaker: "Well, that's too bad for you" The first speaker proceeds in stabbing himself with a knife while laughing hysterecly. First speaker: "ha ha ha ha" Second speaker "emo."

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Robert Dupra getting a girlfriend.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7 7 eight 9

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Why didn't the lawyer submit the car accident he endured to his local courthouse? He was dying of internal brain damage from the shards of glass lodged in his brain from flying through the windshield.

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What did Emmanuel Frimpong say to George Elokobi? you sir, are DENCH

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What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? Pants.

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Forward this anti-joke to at least 15 people And absolutely nothing extraordinary will happen in the next 10 minutes.

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why was the boy crying? cause an elephant tusked him up the ass

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Whats the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?? The WheelChair

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What kind of pizzas did they last order at the World Trade Center? Pepperoni

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says 'Why the long face?' The horse says 'My alcoholism is destroying my family.'

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What did the frog say when it was attacked? Ribbit.

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What is big white and will kill you if it falls out of a tree in winter A refrigerator

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Whats black and blue and red all over? A housewife that was recently abused by her alcoholic wife. (from will c. and jack f.)

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

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What did the monkey say to the newlywed couple? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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your momma is so fat she eats a lot of things

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What is green and smells like paint? Grass, it doesnt smell like paint, I lied.

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Why was the man dress in a suit ? He had a job

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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