What's blue and invisible ? Nothing.... Its impossible to be iinvisible and a color

thumb_up thumb_down -11

An Australian man walking in Manhattan is approached by another man who pulls out a switchblade and says, "give me your wallet or I'll stab you with this knife!" The Australian man hands over his wallet. A nearby police officer witnesses this the last moment of the mugging, arrests the criminal and returns the Australian's belongings.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Roses are rose, violets are violet, that's just a fact, I've got aspergers.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

your moma is sao fat that she is gay . nope im sorry thats just mean.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Smoke Day, Every Weed.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the woman say when she ate crabs. This smells like my vagina (This women died slowly from crabs)

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A Texan, a Mexican, a Brit and a Frenchman are on a plane that begins having engine trouble. The black box was never found.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

"I'm gonna fight fire with fire!" "won't you just get more fire?" "True..."

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Knock knock. Who's there? The IRS, please get out of the way.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q: Why God never got a PhD? A: 1. He had only one major publication. 2. It was written in Aramaic, not in English. 3. It has no references. 4. It wasn't even published in a refereed journal. 5. There are serious doubts he wrote it himself. 6. It may be true that he created the world, but what has he done since then? 7. His cooperative efforts have been quite limited. 8. The Scientific community has had a hard time replicating his results. 9. He unlawfully performed not only Animal, but *Human* testing. 10. When one experiment went awry, he tried to cover it by drowning his subjects. 11. When subjects didn't behave as predicted, he deleted them from the sample. 12. He rarely came to class, just told his students to read the book. 13. Some say he had his son to teach the class. 14. He expelled his first two students for learning. 15. Although there were only 10 requirements, most of his students failed his tests. 16. His office hours were infrequent and usually held on a mountain top.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Who's Juan? DIS ONE

thumb_up thumb_down -13

I couldn't afford haircuts so I purposely contracted cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Knock Knock. Come in.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she was hit by a refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

2 penguins in a tub. one looks to the other an says, "pass the bar of soap." the other looks at him.."what do you think i am, a typewriter?"

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A midget, a nun, and a kangaroo walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

thumb_up thumb_down -17

My math homework brings all the asians to the yard and their like it wasent that hard and their like it wasent that hard. comment what song it is like.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What happened to your face It got hit by a bus By cheyenne

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q: Why is asprin white? A: It works.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Yo momma's so hairy when you were born you almost died from rug burn.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Finn: Jake, why can your body do all of those magical things? Jake: What do you mean? Finn: Oh never mind. And they both proceeded to enjoy a delicious breakfast.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the man cross the road? He was in a state of depression and chose to commit suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops