What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizzas were meant to be put in an oven.

Whats the difference between right and left? I stabbed your mom with my left hand.

why dont they make black forks

How do you sink a Polish submarine? Hit it with a torpedo.

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

Why was the teacher sad? Because her boyfriend broke up with her.

"I'm gonna fight fire with fire!" "won't you just get more fire?" "True..."

Want to hear a funny story? So, these to kids have cancer...

what looks like a bananna but is blue a blue bananna

what did the lawyer say to the lawyer? "whats up lawyer?" what did the banana say to the banana? nothing bananas dint talk...

What could be worse than a giant paint bubble? The Holocaust.

How do you make a man cry? you torture him

Roses are cars, violets are rude, this poem makes no sense, neither do you

A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

What the flower say to the bird. Nothing

why did the black man fall down the stairs? he was blind, do to loss of vision from cancer

Who's the slut of the alphabet? C.

Q.A zebra somehow managed to get out of the zoo and started running all around the town. After some time he saw a zebra crossing(not an original zebra crossing the road but the black and white stripes)on the road.He stoppped suddenly.WHY? A. He was too tired to run any more!!!

Mom says my name I reply Coming.

whay did the monkey fall out of the tree? he was dead. why did the cat fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the monkey.

whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

Hey dude. who died.... crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets YO MAMA

did you know that zach is the coolest person ever? no? well now you know

Ask me if im a truck. Are you a truck? Yes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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