Why did the blonde girl drink lots of water? Because the fat comments got to her and she changed her diet to nothing but water

What's worse than having a FUPA? The Holocaust

What is the connection between a blonde and a halogen headlamp? There is none, one is a female human being with blonde hair and the other is a headlamp with a halogen lightbulb.

Q. What happened to the man that kept an open hand? A. He is in jail because he beat his family

What is worse than finding an apple in you worm? Biting into an apple and finding 2 worms

sandwich. roller coaster. brain sprout. cholera, meander. time. rivet.porcupine. mayonaise. frying. x-ray forever.

roses are red violets are blue i have 5 fingers the middle ones for you.

What did the cancer patient say before they died? I am in so much pain. I love you all

Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad with colours Nice T!ts

It's bright in here *puts on? sunglasses* Ahhh, that's better...

An elephant walked into a pub and ordered a strong Vodka and Coke. "Long day?" asked the barman. "Yeah. Very. So many people stroking my trunk in my apartment - It's meant to be a private place. I'm scared to go back there. One child said they were going to rape me."

My mom

Why do undertakers wear ties? Because their profession is very serious, and it is important that their appearance has a degree of gravitas.

Read a Book.

Why did the girl talk to her computer? Because she was Skyping with some faraway friends. Why were her friends far away? She was sent to the moon. Why was she sent to the moon? Because she tried to create eternal night.

Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? No? Well he graduated in four years with a degree in chemical engineering. He worked hard all four years in order to keep his scholarship to the university. Now he leads a very successful life and lives in a large house with his wife and two children.

Why was 6 afraid of 7 7 eight 9

Mother Theresa, Billy Graham, and Joseph Smith walk into a bar. Just kidding, no they didn't.

How many dead babies can you fit in a child's swimming pool? 9 (Trust me, you won't be able to squeeze the tenth one in there.)

How do you confuse a terrorist? Speak another language other than Arabic

Why was the little boy sad? Because he just got paralized from the waist down and will never be able to walk again.

Why was the little girl crying Someone therew a dump truck at her

What did Emmanuel Frimpong say to George Elokobi? you sir, are DENCH

How can you tell if someone is a global warming alarmist? Their IQ on average is 10 points below normal

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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