Why is it unpleasant to eat a meal with lots of basketball players? Because they will be focussing entirely on discussing tactics (especially if there is an upcoming game), and therefore will probably not be displaying good manners or making polite mealtime conversation.

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Why did t chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock, knock. Who's there? The chicken

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Why did the young boy hit the other young boy? Because the other young boy was bullying his friend and he thought it was time he should stand up for himself and take control of the situation.

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why did tiarnan not ride hi bike to school today? Tiarnans dead

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What noise did Helen Keller make when she fell out of the window? None. She wasn't aware that she was falling and died immediately upon impact. @rowakaflocka

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what do a blonde and a brunette have in common? They were both red-heads until they walked into great clips.

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why cant the porcupine marry the balloon? ...neither one can talk.. obviously.

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Why couldn't the farmer drive his tractor He had no arms why didn't he have arms Because he was a potato

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Why did the old man lose his cane? He didnt. He had alzheimers

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Why was Timmy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face

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A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out your boyfriend's gay

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A little boy walks into a bar its fine, he's over 21, he just looks younger.

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How do you steal from a sushi buffet? You say please.

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Because the tractor hadn't seen the chicken.

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Daughter: Dad I have some news for you Dad: What is it? Daughter: I am pregnant Dad: ... I am so happy I am going to have a grandson, my 27 year old daughter just married and now pregnant, this is a great day!

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what did the guy say when he lost his sandwich? wheres my sandwich?

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Why did the guy eat pizza? Because he likes pizza.

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Q. Why couldn't the blind black guy read. A. He's Dead

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Why do you call a person who spits in your cheeseburger? A mean person

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There once was a man from Nantucket, Who had an average-sized penis he only used during monogamous sex with his spouse.

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Q: How are a plum and a rabbit alike? A: They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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How do you fit an elephant inside your car? I don't understand why this task would even need to be performed. I have never arrived anywhere in my car and thought "Sure could use an elephant right about now..."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He never did because he's in KFC

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops