A Jew ran into a wall with a boner. He broke his nose first.

Why couldn't Jimmy ride his bike? Jimmy was a goldfish.

You know what makes jokes funny? Irony You know what makes anti-jokes funny? Common sense

What did the little boy say to his cat? Masturbate on my moms corpse.

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A Redhead, a Blonde, and a Brunette are all standing on top of a cliff in Ireland. They took a few pictures, and all in all it was a lovely vacation.

Daughter: Dad I have some news for you Dad: What is it? Daughter: I am pregnant Dad: ... I am so happy I am going to have a grandson, my 27 year old daughter just married and now pregnant, this is a great day!

Why did the midget cross the road? He needed to buy a ladder

What's red and fun to drink through a bendy straw? Period blood

A car with three black people in it is driven off a cliff and everyone dies. Why is this a tragedy? Because it is always a tragedy when human life is lost.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He never did because he's in KFC

Why is it so hard to find slim fitting clothes in America? Because not many clothing stores carry them.

Here comes the bride, all dressed in white. Here comes the groom, carrying a broom, because somebody spilled something on the floor.

What does a squirrel get when it rains? It gets wet.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He had escaped from his farm and didn't understand the laws of jaywalking.

Q: How do you do to get an elephant down from a tree? A: Wait for the fall when the leaves start falling you shoot it down.

Why did the Mexican mow lawns? He needed money to pay for his college tuition.

I hate when people see me at the store and are like "What are you doing here??" and Im just like, "Oh, you know, hunting elephants..."

A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

whats the difference between a can and a fish?they can both swim. exept for the can.

what did your mum say when she ran into chuck norris? hello chuck norris

What do you call a bunch black people falling off a cliff? A mudslide! What do you call a bunch of white people falling off a cliff? An avalanch!

Roses are red, Violets are Blue Last night was amazing, I have Aids

An English ship lands in the New World and offers to trade with the natives. The ship actually carried foreign diseases that the natives had no immunity to, and they all died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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