Why did the Jew lock the chest? Because that's where he was hiding the body.

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Whats invisible and smells lile carrots? Rabbit fart

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Get up Look in the mirror

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A cat playing laser tag.

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What is 6 1/2 inches when erected? My penis.

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An Irish man sips at a large beer. Oh yeah and your mother's a whore.

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How do you stop a lumberjack? You thrust a javelin through his lungs

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You:Knock knock friend:who's there you:come in friend come on who you:come in your mother

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Why couldn't Bob pick up his pen? Because a nuclear bomb just set off where he lives and it incinerated everything.

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What do you call a man who burns his country's flag on it's independence day? Unpatriotic

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How do you stop a baby from crying? Douse it in gas and throw it in a fire

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Why did the chicken crose the rode? Because there was a 10 foot scorpion chaseing it

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My father stole my mothers heart, he's in jail for murder

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I knew a little girl once. She was ate before she was seven.

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A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he is keeping company with a swine, and the muslim feels offended for the poor horse.

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What's funny? Nick Sotelo

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What is a dyslexic mathematician's favourite song? Angels. [L]

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An Irish man walks into a bar. The bartender looks at him and notices he has a steering wheel stuck down the front of his pants. "Hey," he says, "What's with the steering wheel down your pants?" The Irish man looks down at it, dumbfounded. "I have absolutely no idea," he says, and removes it.

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Why did dave not hug his wife? becuase he said she looked horrifying from the war in iraq.

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Whats funny about a guy with no legs? I bought him a wheelchair.

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Patient: "Doctor, my arm hurts when I poke it with my index finger." Doctor: "That's because your finger is broken."

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I believe if Floyd Mayweather fought Muhammad Ali I believe it would be a close fight but Floyd would win. Because Ali has Parkinson's

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What is the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes home from camp.

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Why should you be scared when a black man asks you, "What are looking at?" Because if he is over the age of 18, he should know better than to end a sentence with a preposition, unless of course, he never had an education, in which case... you should probably run for your life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops