What is orange and sounds like a parrot? A Carrot.

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A man walks in to a bar and everyone screamed running out the door.

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Relax, anyway I hope its just the not not hypnotic suggestion, it would be really disappointing to to know that you are high on weed, even if it is very relaxing, not that I would know, I tried valium once, it kinda increased that sensation you have tenfold. Anyway, what I meant to say was, would you kindly tell me what size your breasts are? Do you shave down there?

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read this sentence again.

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I'm a blonde... rejected from Kaplan.

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How do you get a drummer off your doorstep? Ask politely.

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What do Kurt Cobain and a whale have in common? Both have holes in the back of their heads

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What's tall black and has curly hair? A black guy

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Guest what in the butt

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Laughter is the best medicine. No, Heroin is.

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Allmighty Genie vs Common douche Genie: I the allmighty Genie am at your command, I can grant you any three WISHES Common douche: Okay! I want to sit on my own lap Genie: Uh...Well...You uh sure you want that? I Uh... Wait a moment please... Wimp wins Genieous victory.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? ?? She had just prepared her breakfast and was late for her full-time job as a police officer.

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Mamma why did the kids make fun of me today? I dont know.

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A russian gives away vodka.

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Did you hear about the blonde that crashed her car? No. Is she okay?

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A white guy and a black guy are sitting in a bar. The white guy apologizes to the black guy for the hundreds of years of slavery endured by his people.

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One day there was 2 black guys in hoodys with knives in there hand. They tapped me on the shoulder and took my groceries. They then made me a jam sandwich and went on there way

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Hey, I just met you And this is scabies So I'm prescribing you some permethrin.

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Why did they choose Madonna to perform in the halftime show? Because she might die soon.

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Friends are just like trees. They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

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what is bad about being a black jew? you have to sit in the back of the oven

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Do not lose hope, you have always considered me hard to get, while this time, I came to you. Next time too, I kinda owe you.

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ROMEO ROMEO WHEREFORE ART THOU ROMEO

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A: What do you call a female bombing the white house? Q: A terrorist

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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