What did Ben's Graandma get him for Christmas? Nothing, she died on Thanksgiving!

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roses are red violets are red the whole world is red i started the holocaust

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Why did the balck man sit at the back of the bus? Because all the other seats were taken.

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What's worse than a dead baby? Two dead babies.

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What did Jesus say to the jews? Fuck you.

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How do you find your way out of the impossible maze? You don't.

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Knock Knock whos there? Semore Frickelson Semore Frickelson Who? What other Semore Frickelson do you know!? Let me in its freezing out here!

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why did the chicken cross the road? who cares?

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How many blondes does it take to change a diaper? About a thousand

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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Whats the difference between a black man and a mexican? The skin pigmentation and most likely the size of their penis

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What do you call a german soldier? A Nazi

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RECTUM? Damn near spelled "Wrecked Him" the wrong way!

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I'm not saying my mother-in-law is fat, because she is anorexic.

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Q:What did Batman say to Robin just before they got into the Batmobile? A:"Robin get in the Batmobile"

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A man asked Alexander the Great if he was gay, yet Alexander the Great was not offended. Why? Because "gay" has a rather different connotation than in the modern world than it did in earlier time periods where it meant "happy". Also, Macedonians, Alexander the Great's native people, did not speak English so he would not understand the question. Also Alexander the Great was gay in the sense that he was actually a homosexual.

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What did the irishman say when he walked into a bar? Ouch

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You know whats funny? Women's rights

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Q:John has 50 candy bars and he eats 45, what does john have? A: Diabetes

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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this isn't meant to be a joke, but just letting all of you know, inside jokes don't count and kony jokes aren't funny

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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Who looks like Bill Cosby, Smells like Bill Cosby, But isn't Bill Cosby? An imposter who should be sent to jail.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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