why was the girl unhappy? because she was stapled to a shark.

your mom is so fat, she stepped on the scale and said, "I really need to eat better and I'm thinking about getting a gym membership." She did so, and she lost so much weight that all her friends congratulated her everywhere she went, and some didn't even recognize her.

You're welcome. On to the next house.

A muslim man with a long beard and wearing a turban and robe boards an aircraft with a large suitcase. The plane later arrives at its destination a few minutes past the estimated arrival time due to bad weather.

This ones for the dudes: Whats worse then having sex with a woman with no penis? Having se with a man

whats worse than someone on the phone during a movie? your mother queefing on your bowl of cheerios

What's worse than the Holocaust? The eventual extinction of humanity, followed by the death of the universe.

Roses are red, Violets are glorious, Don't try to surprise Oscar Pistorius.

Seven monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and broke its head! Momma called the doctor, And the doctor said, "I'm sorry, Mrs.Monkey, but your son has suffered a severe concussion, and will be very mentally impaired for the rest of his life."

What's 2+2? Gonorrhea

So an African, Asian, and White man walk into a bar, what do they all have in common? Believe it or not, they all liked cantaloupe.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To see if he can make before the car hits him.

there is a black guy and a mexican in a car whos driving? a cop

What's the difference between a ginger and a brick? Bricks get laid

Have you seen Stevie Wonders house?. No, Well neither has he...

a man was shot.... he died

Why did the man with no arms fall of his bike? Someone threw a washing machine at him

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: No one knows, he was a chicken, and was not capable of human speech, so he never told anyone.

Q: What did the Catholic man say in response to the gay man asking what he likes to do? A: golf

What did the cracker say to the cheese? You're so cheesy.

Two fuses wearing bombs for hats were sitting on a bench with their frayed feet dangling on the ground. A match was walking along and tripped, hitting it's head on the ground and bursting into flame. Luckily the fuses had finished lunch by that time and gone back to work. Unluckily for the match it died from burns to 80 percent of it's body.

Why did the Nazi Doctor drown a Jew in the lake? To see how long it would take a Jew to drown with its big nose. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

What did the hedgehog say to the beaver? Nothing, they can't talk.

Roses are brown Violets are brown Who pooped in my garden?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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