What's black and is hanging from a tree in my backyard? Avocados.

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What do you call dinosaur flatulence? Jurassic Fart!

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Why couldn'nt Sally swing on the swing? Because Sally was a carrot

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Man one: Why does the moon look like a face? Man two: I don't know, why? Man one: I don't know either, that's why i asked....

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Why was the plumber sad? Because his whole family died in a plane crash.

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why was the boys t.v broken? because he through it out the window

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Yo momma's so fat that her weight is completely disproportional to the average weight of someone her age.

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stinky boner

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I GOT YOUR BUTT PUSSY!

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Q: What did the bus driver say to the black man? A: Nothing, he simply greeted him with a nod, as he would do to any other person who chose to ride the bus.

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why did the man have a hole in his face? because syphillis had eaten a hole in it

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Osama bin Laden walks into a bar. Just joking, he's dead.

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What's the difference between a porcupine and a BMW? A porcupine has it's pricks on the outside. A BMW doesn't have pricks on it's bodywork, for a multitude of reasons: - it would increase the coefficient of drag, causing an increase in fuel consumption - the pricks would fall foul of pedestrian safety regulations

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Yo momma so fat, when she turns around, people give her a welcome back party!

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Why does Hilter hate Jews? He's incapable of hating because he's dead.

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How much cabbage is in sean's teeth? lots, like it's rotting in there

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I remember the last words my grandpa said before he kicked the bucket. I bet I can kick this bucket. He missed and had a heart attack.

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Teacher: What is 1+1? Student: 2 Teacher: Next time raise your hand before answering a question.

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your mom gave me head.....phones

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What do you get if you cross a bomb expert, and a homophobe a blow job

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Q: Why Cant The T-Rex Clap? A: No, Its Not Because His arms are to short, Its because he's Dead You Idiot...

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A duck walked into a bar and said "ouch."

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I dunno, I dont grade love, I want to see you, touch you, bang you (sorry for not having the guts to use a nicer word, but I am tired and that is what I have in me now) And while that makes me sound like some hippy, I am very fucking picky about who I spend time with, and when. And I got no male friends, waste of time, why spend time with guys when I can spend time with chicks. Excuse me, just need my meds, speaking of sincerity, yeah I use medications, wont tell you what, but its well, not for my "mental disorders" I was born crazy, and I am going to die like I live: INSANE.

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Why do Mexican's wear pointy shoes? Because its part of their culture and is used as a sign of dignity when dancing to tribal music

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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