Why are women so obsessed with not having penises? I'm serious. Imagine an ordinary woman out there, who is not doing any of the activities that the women-not-having-penises thing is famous for. But I can pretty much guarantee that under her clothes at that very moment, she isn't having a penis. And for no good reason. Sometimes I suspect women keep up the no-penis thing even in their sleep. Frankly, I find that creepy. Why are women so obsessed with not having penises?

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Why are rich people usually fat? They're living large

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A man walks into a bar... He has a severe drinking problem, and his wife weeps for him

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What do a Nazi and a Democrat have in common? They are both members of a highly supported political faction.

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why does chuck norris not have a middle name? because his parents didn't want him to have one.

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What's the worst part about anti jokes? They get boring after a while

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This is a joke about Helen Keller. "Knock knock" "Who's there?

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why was the boy sad? there was a frog stapled to his face.

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What's worse than biting into a worm in your apple? Being run over by a stampede of elephants

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A praying mantis is very graceful

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Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7,8,9

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What did the woman find when she got home from the post office? Her son's corpse hanging from a clothes hanger. She was an abusive mom, and he killed himself.

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Rarity: "So, what is that splendid frock of yours saying?" Maud Pie: "It doesn't talk. It's a dress."

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Why did the man ask the IPhone to marry him He was smoking weed

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I'm attracted to you like the earth is attracted to the sun. With a force that is inversely proportional to the distance squared.

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whats worse than getting ur penis cut off......no holocaust

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What's harder than nailing a dead baby on a tree? My dick while doing it.

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How do you find dennis ferguson? Look at danyons bckground

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what's the difference between a lion and an ostrich? they are both birds, a part from the lion

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What do you call postman pat without a job? Pat.

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What do you call a belt made of watches? A waist of time

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Why did Mr. Cannon dies Because he got shot as an undercover cop in south america

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What's the difference between a bucket of shit and a black guy? -the bucket.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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