This is in Spanish when you're not looking.Just kidding, that's not possible. It's actually German.

In my country we don't swim, we drown.

I am the best i am the worst My wife was buried in hearse

Charlie Sheen is winning

roses are red violets are blue i have some cheese im going to eat it

If you say "Hi" to every tree you pass, is that being environmentally friendly?

Why did jack fall off a cliff? Coz the hill was on a cliff.

Patient- Doctor! I feel like a piece of ****! Doctor- What is ****? Patient- It's four dots on the computer screen representing a curse word. Doctor- What computer screen?

Why was the man foolish for buying a new lamp? Because he lived in a small shack with no electricity and was probably going to die soon.

Why is SkrillEX bad at fishing? S EX

a morman walks into a bar, he buys a 7up.

Why is it scientifically proven that even Spider-Man would be a match for Superman? Because none exist. Moral: The only Super Hero... not scientifically proven, but I exist so that makes me stronger than both of them!

I'm a vegan thats why I am still a Virgin.

How do you drown a blonde. Put a scratch 'n' sniff at the bottom of a pool.

How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? One, its not a difficult task.

A circus clown climbs to the top of a five-storey ladder and dives into a foot-deep pool of water below. His neck is broken on impact. RIP Chuckles.

What do you call a black man with pantyhose on his head. A white guy in the dark with black pantyhose on his head

What did Harry Potter say when he lost his wand? Where's my wand?

Q: What is strange about Arabs? A: Very little.

A priest and rabbi walk into a bar. The priest leaves because they don't have wine.

Why cant Hellen Keller read? Because shes dead!!!

I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

Two men walk into a bar. They get drunk.

What did the oak tree say to the pine tree? Nothing tress dont speak regardless of the kind.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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