Why did the plane crash into the mountain? The Pilot was a tomato

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Why did the deaf man attend the music concert? He was invited by friends and wasn't doing anyhting else that evening.

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A blonde just got a call from her boyfriend. He said i'll meet you at your house, so the blonde drove home, excited. Once the blonde got home her boyfriend was having sex with another girl. The blonde burst into tears and pulled out her gun then stuck it to her head. " No dont do it!" her boyfriend said!...... the blonde, not knowing what to do next said, " Shut up you cheater you're next!"

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was drunk.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because aliens dont wear purple hats.

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why was the little boy crying? He had dead mice shoved up his asshole.

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welcome to australia. *kangaroo kicks you in the gut and you keel over, whereupon you are stampeded by wild dingoes and eaten by tasmanian devils*

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You know how I know you're gay? Because you came out to your close family and friends, who were all very respectful and accepting.

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What was a hard time for people? the great depression

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Why did the black guy buy a jug of grape soda Because he was thirsty

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Knock Knock No one's home Okay, I'll come back later.

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chuck norris once kicked a man verry hard that man proceded to lose contiosness and chuck norris was disqualified from the martial arts compatition

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Ask me if I'm a carrot Are you a carrot? No

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Q. A couple went on a boat. The boat sank. Every single person died, who survied? A. The couple.

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CUT MY SOUL INTO PIECES MY NAME IS VOLDEMORT TERMINATION YOU'RE BLEEDING DON'T GIVE A F**K IF I HAVE NO NOSE FOR BREATHING

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Your mamma so jobless, that she needs a job! ~T.J.C.S.

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An Englishman, a Scotsman and a Welshman are all in the Great Britain Olympic squad,

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I believe if Floyd Mayweather fought Muhammad Ali I believe it would be a close fight but Floyd would win. Because Ali has Parkinson's

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Why did the soccer player miss practice? He got shot in the face.

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Yo momma so fat she decided to have lipo suction

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I wumbo, you wumbo, he, she, wumbo, wumbology the study of wumbo

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Why didn't the man go to work on Friday the 13th? Because he was unemployed.

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What do you call double A's? Batteries

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Roses are red, Violets are purple.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops