whats red and brown and goes about 30mph? a squirrel in a blender.

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Who's blind but can see, deaf but can hear, and dumb yet can solve the most complex mathematical equations? Helen Keller-Norris

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

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What did the boy say after he fell out of the tree? Nothing, he died.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Knock knock. Who's there? It's me. Oh, come on in. Thanks.

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Whats The diference between a park bench and a black man? A park bench can support a family of five hahahhaahahah

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Why were the Dinosaurs wiped out? Porridge.

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Roses are red,violets are blue, i love the colour red and green but its a pitty because im not so keen.

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Have you ever seen a cowboy chasing boot?

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Why was the man "hanging around"? He committed suicide.

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You know what's funny with rape? Nothing. It's horror.

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What is long, hard, cries a lot, and can't fall down a man-hole? A baby with a javelin through its neck.

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I have read and agree to the Terms of Service

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How many dead guys does it take to build a shed? None. The contractor did it for 40 dollars an hour using maple wood.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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what did the grandma do after she was pushing up daisies? washed her hands because gardening is a dirty activity

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What's the difference between a BMW and a pile of dead babies? There isn't a BMW in my garage.

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What did Tarzan shout when he saw the elephants coming? "Here come the elephants!"

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What do you call a black doctor? Doctor.

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What do you call a Black guy picking cottnon? A cottonpicker

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Your mother is so fat because she inherited poor genes and dietary habits from her own parents.

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I need a sidecart on my motorcycle just for my diick

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What's worse than finding a worm on your apple? Trench foot on your eyebrow.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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