I banged your mom so hard that she got a urinary tract infection.

Q: Whats different about pizza and jewish people? A: Pizzas don't scream in the oven.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf and blind, which both make it very unsafe for her to drive.

What do a plum and a bunny have in common? They're both purple. Except the bunny.

WHATS A CRUM AND LIVES IN A SLUM ?? A BOY CALLED KEVIN CRUMMY

Q. What did the mockingbird say to the blue jay? A. I mock you by mocking you

How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb? NONE A YO F******G BUSINESS!!!

A baby is cold and won't drink it's milk It's dead

A man walked into a bar. Ouch.

Yolo is for losers, I have 9 lives...meow

Why can't Stevie Wonder read? He has retinopathy of prematurity and was born blind.

Why lets go Mets? Lets go Yankees!

Q. What do you call a retarted guy? A. Whatever his name happens to be

They say duck tape can fix every thing, Not my grandma's cancer for that matter.

What's worse then mud on your shoes. Being assassinated by means of a dart to the throat.

LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL -LOL GUY

Math Problem: John has 32 candy bars. He eats 28 of them. What does he have now? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

A frog jumped on the lilly pad, it sank and drown and all of the tadpoles didn't have a mother and inevitably died

A handicapped man walks into a bar...

Q: why did the dad drop his baby? A: she was slippery.

Roses are red Violets are violet Why does it go like that anyways? ~Yasmin~

Cheetahs run at an alarmingly fast rate for short periods of time. Until I shoot them with harpoons.

what did the man say to the sad woman? go make ma a sammich before i hit you again! the women refused and was hit again.

Why does everyone love Randy Jackson? Well it's sure not because he's black.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...