What's worse than a burglar breaking into your house in the middle of the night? A rapist breaking into your house in the middle of the night.

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Guy 1: Where's your dog Guy 2: I Dunno Guy 1: I ate it

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What's worse than getting full-blown AIDS? Finding a half-eaten worm in your apple.

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Q: Why did the kid get Christman presents in August? A: Because it was cheaper than chemotherapy.

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What did the gym coach tell his student? Come on! You can do it! Push harder!

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse, incapable of understanding the human languages, promptly shits on the floor and leaves...

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What do you get when you cross a rooster with a cocker spaniel? Nothing, because roosters and Dog's don't mix.

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Whats green and has white spots? Idk im asking you

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a Gay Man Walks Into A Bar And See's its Only Women In There, He Screams And Leaves

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Knock knock Who's there Done Done who? Done with waiting out here, let me in you dick!

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So a hispanic man and a black man jump from a tree, which one hits the ground first? The hispanic man, the rope caught the black man.

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Why did the boy find love? because if the girl did not love her he would kill her

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"I saw daddy with mommy last night. I think he was stealing my milk."

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Why did Sara fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sara.

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Two homosexuals are making love in the kitchen. One leaves for a bit and says, "Dont finish without me." Upon returning, white goo is spattered across the floor. Concerned that the clumsily dropped icing may stain, they promptly clean it.

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Why am I writing this? Cuz I am eating babies alive right now!

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(Knocks on Helen Keller's door) You: Knock knock Helen:....

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Q: How many electricians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: 1, idiot.

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What walks like a duck, talks like a duck, and looks like a duck? Nothing. Ducks cannot speak, therefore this description negates all known living organisms.

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Why didn't Superman save anyone on September 11? He was in a wheelchair.

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Why did the chicken crose the rode? Because there was a 10 foot scorpion chaseing it

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Why did the girl fall over? She was poisoned for being the fairest one of all.

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Roses are chickens violets are pizza this poem makes no sense, Refridgerator

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Why did the elephant cross the road? It was being poached

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops