What's worst then leaving a public toilet when you just took a shit and the toilet is now clogged Realising that the maid was waiting for you to get out to clean the toilet...

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WHY DID THE MAN RUN A MILE?.BECAUSE HE WAS TRYING TO CATCH HIS NOSE AND GET A TISSUE

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What do your mum and dad have in common Not much your dads dead

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Text Klarens at 317-653-8695. Tell him crazy shit or send crazy pictures.

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Excuse me, I have a shitload of stuff to do, so you are Eliza huh? I thought that was just one person conveying something to someone. Anyway, what is your name? My name is actually Nero, but you do not strike me as an Eliza, first name is more than enough. You know, if you dare, Ill be back shortly, I was gonna shower but then again, I haven't moved at all today, so yeah. Saved you? I have never saved anyone well, excuse me then, see you around, worry less about people bothering with us chatting, hell they might risk learning something (not a chance, people here are fucking jackasses, with one exception, and I do not mean me this time).

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A apple is red a banana is to never mind that joke sucks

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Trust me, you are that kind of girl, and no, you are not nerdy, you are open and down to ground, while your beautiful exterior means a lot to me (I am a man, its the way I am), I would never have wanted to talk to you or even less visit you with a pack (make it five packs) of condoms, if you where the awkward Asperger kind of gal, so how old are you, like seriously?

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Your mother is so fat, she appeals to my secret fetish.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Explain the concept of time travel.

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How did the little boy with cancer run in his running race??? Very Well....

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What do you call a poor man on the side of the rode asking for money? A poor man on the side of the rode asking for money.

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Why wasn't the cab driver sent to prison after bombing the school? It was a suicide bombing.

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How do you make a black guy cry? You kill his family.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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how many people does it take to change a light bulb....... none..................its stilll bright

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Q: Why is little Timmy living without his parents? A: He is ninety seven years old!

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Why did the girl talk to her computer? Because she was Skyping with some faraway friends. Why were her friends far away? She was sent to the moon. Why was she sent to the moon? Because she tried to create eternal night.

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What do you call postman pat without a job? Pat.

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What do you call a girl with ADD and too much free time? Me

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What you do you call a gay man with no arms and legs? His name.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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Q: why wasn't the fan spinning? A: because it wasn't on. Duh....

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How do u kill a black man You don't or else u will get intouble for murder but u can if u want there r many ways

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why didn't the unicorn have a horn? It was a horse. Why didn't the horse have a horn? it was not a unicorn.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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