A man decided it was time to quit his job so he put his 2 weeks in and went to look for another job.

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Large 4

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A man jumped off a cliff and wished he could fly. He was hit by a plane

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Where it had just witnessed a horrific car accident involving it's spouse, who died on impact. Eventually the chicken fell into a deep depression, taking it out on his children in the form of physical abuse. Over time, the chicken ended up being alone, having no contact with his kids, having no friends, and living in a massive house with no one else. One day, he had a stroke, and no one called an ambulance because no one knew.

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Why did billy go to the beach? To spread his moms ashes on the sand.

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why did bob eat the cookie? because he was hungry

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Roses are red... Violets are blue... I have Alzheimers... CHEESE ON TOAST

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Boy: Mother, I'm dying! Mother: Ha, lol, I put poison in your cheese! Boy: MOTHER! Boy: *dies*. Mother: Ha, lol!

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whats worse than a leaf in your bed? World hunger, global warming, the economy......

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What do you call a green blur in the sky? Super pickle?

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Why do dragons shoot fire? I don't know, I'm asking you the question.

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yo mommas so fat she heard it was chilly out so she ran inside and got a bowl

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A man walked into a bar. He was accused of being to drunk to drive so someone called a cab for him and he was forced to leave.

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What's the difference between dead babies and the holocaust? A lot.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to take three harpoons to the chest and still manage to feast on a family of baby seals...... Hi my name is Joey

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A guy walks up to a midget and he says: 'What do you want to be when you grow up?'

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Congratulations, sir. The judge has determined that the charges of traffic violation against you were indeed incorrect, and you will be given a large sum of cash for your wasted time.

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What? Huh?

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What do a bike and a duck have in common? They both have handlebars except for the duck.

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why does andy speak when not spoken too because he wants a smack

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Why did the man rob the house? He had a horrible childhood which led him to making these bad choices.

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The Ohio State Buckeyes

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Why did the girl scream at old people? She had turrets. www.youtube.com/LouisGames www.twitch.tv/KiLM_Ghostz

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What did the Macedonian guy say to the Croatian guy? Both of our countries are from the former Yugoslavia.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops