What's long and blackand goes all night? night time

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What did the man say to the other man? I would have no clue because I am deaf

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a blind man walks off a cliff..... he's dead now.

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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are you from tennesse? cuase you sure look like a f u c k e d up redneck

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How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just two, the mystery is how mice can get inside a lightbulb.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Actually, 6's fear was totally irrational, and thus unexplainable. This sort of fear is generally referred to as a phobia.

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Why did the train stop? - It was surrounded by elephants

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If I earned a dollar for every time you've said, "I'm too old for this sh*t," I wouldn't have made very much money. You are a giraffe.

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What do you call a black priest? "Father" if you are Christian.

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How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

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what happens when you step on a bear trap? Alot of pain.

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What isyellow and can't swim? a bulldozer

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What did god say to Jesus. "Dude, she's not a virgin"

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What's long and black The unemployment line

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What was so funny about my sister getting raped? Nothing, there's never anything funny about someone getting raped, especially when it is a close friend or family member

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Why couldn't Helen Keller read? Tree sap.

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Q: How do you make Osama Bin Ladin happy? A: Take him out to a nice seafood dinner free of charge.

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Why was the plumber sad? Because his family died in a car crash

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Why do Squirrels accidentally plant millions of trees. Because they bury their nuts and forget where they are.

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Q: What did Batman say when Robin was in the Batmobile? A: Robin, get out of the Batmobile.

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What do you call it when a blonde jumps off the Empire State Building without a parachute? Suicide.

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Q: Why did the child fall? A: Because I shot him in the leg.

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What's worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? The extinction of the human species.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops