Why was little David sad? His father got hit by a truck.

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find the o 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duh its up top

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Why did sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by an 18 wheeler Knock knock Whos there not sally

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A: Knock Knock B: 7

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Q. What has 5 chins, 10 eyes, 10 feet, and 50 fingers? A. Five People.

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What's green and has wheels? Nope, it's a car.

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how many people does it take to change a light bulb....... none..................its stilll bright

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What did the vampire use to make tea? Hot water, a kettle, and some nice green tea leaves given to him by his great uncle for kwanza.

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Why did Johnny disappear? He was sucked into a vacuum toilet on an air jet.

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Q: You and a thousand other people are suddenly bursting in flames at a park, there is a big barrel of water just a few steps away from you, what do you do in order to save the people that truly matter? A: Stop drop and roll, duh!

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What did Buzz say to Woody? A lot. There were 3 movies.

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A thief stole a calendar. Later, feeling guilty, he returned it to its owner, admitted his misconduct, and went to a local minimart to purchase his own.

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? -because she had no arms

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A guy walked up to me and said "I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam, I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam." I promptly informed the authorities. He was transported to a mental institution and I later learned that he swallowed his own tongue and died. Nobody attended his funeral.

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What do you call a man with an arrow to the knee? An ambulance because he's got a serious leg injury right there.

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Why did the black women sing to the left to the left? Answer: because black people have no rights

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How do you catch a unique animal? You get professional hunters to catch the animal.

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If you are riding on a boat and all the wheels fall off, how many pancakes would it take to make a dog house? It does not matter because fish don't like tomatoes.

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Whats the difference between a giraffe and an elephant. Ones a giraffe and ones and elephant

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why did the kids pull the fire alarm? because there was a fire.

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A duck walks into a bar and says, "Put it on my bill"

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How can you tell your not italian? You aint no Guito!

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Roses are Red Your Face Has Turned Blue This Pillow I have Is Smothering You

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Don`t be mean? WOMAN! DO YOU NOT HOW TERRIBLE THE DEMAND YOU MAKE IS? ...Fine alright, I wont leave you hanging then... So I wont call. Moral: "Seriously though, I am leaving too, but I want the top comment"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops