A Jew, a Russian, and a Turk walk into a bar. The Jew asks, "Can I get a glass of Manischewitz?" The bartender serves him. The Russian asks, "Can I get a shot of vodka?" The bartender serves him. The Turk then asks, "Can I get a Turkish coffee?" The bartender looks at him, confused, and says, "Sorry, but this is a bar. Unfortunately we don't serve coffee."

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Why is the earth round? Because God saw it was flat and thought "too flat lets turn it around" And all was good.

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Why was little georgia afraid of the tea cup ? Because she was tripping over the holocaust.

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Q: Why didn't johnny get any Christmas presents? A: Because he died in a house fire 3 years ago.

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"Knock Knock" "Who's There" "The Police" "The Police Who" "Ma'am your son just died in a car accident"

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What do you get if you cross a centipede with a millipede? I don't know but it sure has a lot of legs

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When time is the best time to make a wish during the day? 9:11

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A man punches a 3rd grader in the stomach. Not long after he is arrested and no longer is allowed within 500 feet of a public school.

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Doctor Doctor I keep thinking I`ve got a car behind me. Don`t worry about that you have aids.

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Helena: Can u get me a pencil? Me: Sure. Me: Mr. Brandmeyer can u give me a pencil? Mr. Brandmeyer: Why? Me: I don't know. That's what Helena said.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer...and the other is a watermelon.

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What has 4 legs and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you a pool table

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how did the man with just a head hide the fact that he murdered someone? im not sure but this seems highly untrue as someone could not kill someone with just their head.

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Why did they bury the firefighter behind the hill? Because he was dead.

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I like my coffee like i like my women ... With big titys

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whats the sad part of 4 negroes driving off a cliff? the car couldve fit 5

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Why Did The Black Man Cry? KFC Went Bankrupt!

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How many Jews can you fit in the car? 4 in the seats and 6 million in the ashtray.

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What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungee cord? My ass.

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Knock Knock! Who's There? Tourettes Kid. Touret- FUCK SHIT!

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Why did Johnny play piano with one hand? Because he lost his other one in a mining accident when he was 10. Johnny lives in rural Perú so he had to support his 6 younger brothers and sisters by working in a child factory.

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What do you get when you throw a bagel at a chicken? One less bagel.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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