A guy walks into a bar, and says, "The Aristocrats!"

whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a red corvette? i don't have a red corvette in my garage

What did the muslim do at the airport? He bought a ticket to New York and proceeded to fly there to mourn his brother who was killed during the terrorist attacks on 9/11.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You're adopted.

I recently sent 10 puns to a joke website, hoping that one of them would win a competition. Unfortunately, they were deemed offensive.

What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

Q: What did the nazi say to hitler? A: You like my Auschwitz?

What do they call Chinese food in China? Food

Doctor, doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains! That's a rather strange psychological problem I think you should consult a professional psychologist rather than see me.

A man is walking down the street and sees a women sat on the pavement crying, he walks over to her and asks "what's wrong?" to which the women replies "it doesn't matter" the women then walks away as she did not want to share private information with a stranger.

Best reaction to Anti-humor joke me: whats green and has wheels Friend: idk Me: Grass i lied about the wheels Friend:wow dick

What do you call a man who's a gynecologist, painter and respected martial arts champion? Talented.

so you're waling through the desert and a tire falls off your canoe. How many pancakes does it take to shingle a doghouse?

Why is Skrillex so bad a fishing? He has Parkinson's Disease

Why Cant michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he is dying of Parkinson's disease.

Why did Johnathan drop his popsicle? He was hit by a bus. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Johnathan

i hate non minorities!

Hush, little baby, don't say a word, Mama's going to buy you a mockingbird. If that mockingbird won't sing, Mama's going to buy you a another mockingbird.

Whats the difference between Osama and Obama? The S is replaced with a B.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was clumsy.

What's the best thing about the Pixies? Their music.

what do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch names

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

An Irishman, a Zimbabwean and a South African walk into a bar... oh wait, it's just the English cricket team.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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