A deaf man is listening to the radio. Think about it.

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when the zombie apocolypse comes what do you do? you die

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How do you stop a dog from barking? Cut it's head off

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How do you stop a baby crying? You don't. Just walk away.

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why did the man choke at the lunch table. Police there is a banana attacking me what should I do?

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Adam Claypool is a fag. and his mother sweats my cum. Now that we got that out of the way lets get to the jokes.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? This site.

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My friend is a famous actor. Fooled you! I have no friends.

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What did the fisherman say to the other fisherman? Were both fishermen

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How do you get a girl with two jobs to drop on her knees? Through a penny on the knees

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What did the woman with a terminal illness get for Christmas? A diagnosis.

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas? A Wii.

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What do astronauts do if the want a party? They planet

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What happened to the girl who got an abortion? She got an infection.

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A man walks into a bar. The other patrons suddenly start to run away screaming, because he had just been hit by a bus.

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What did the depressed girl say to her mother? I cut my wrists

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Knock Knock Sadly the old woman was death and didn't hear the door knock.

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In 1843 when Man invented the moon, people set sail on ironclad ships to lands that sold items that weren't for sale in similar such stores in other lands not reachable by ironclad ships or dirigibles as they became known once they changed form completely and were a differentobject entirely and of no use for water transport. That's when the real revolution in telecommunications began, the truck drivers would use CB radios as early as 1287 and 1276 in Canada. the CB radio enabled the users to order pizza and develop symbiotic relationshiops with canvas. Amongst other things.

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Lol you respond here goood one AAANDEEERS TEN MG PER PILL Asswhipe! Besides friends call me Black Metal, you can call me Nero the avenger. Line kinda broke up with you first, you think she would send you a picture with my finger on her... cough... AND THINK YOU WOULD STILL STIck aROUND WITH HER? Id be more... well glad for your mothers sake, btw, she got me flowers, I wont tell the rest, but she got me another pic... Okay ill tell the rest then, first pic is my fingas, the other is my limpo in her mouth... The third is the funny doctor which caught us and wanted all three of us to be on the pic... Aww, no really man, you had a gem, we where good friends before me and Line, but she did not want to leave before she got me flowers... Aww... Ooooh... Oh! Well not yet but you get the picutre. I got ur message, sure im high as a kite, but I know what im doing if you can "picture" what I mean... Dont tell your mom btw, I want to surprise her, (reverse psychology) hmm, that did I write that? Anyway, how is your sister doing? I dont think she gives those strangely long hugs to anyone but me, and she laughed wen i got a boner... NERO, never call me, never ever call Me black, besides its either Mr.Black, oor black metla you rat! VALIUM? SERIOUSLY? Ill get that test extended you know... Because POISONING!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he saw some pandas spooning.

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Women's rights

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse replies, "my wife has cancer."

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A black guy pulls into a KFC drive thru and orders some chicken. The cashier tells him that they are out of chicken, so the black goes to McDonald's instead.

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What did the boy say before he died? I'm dying.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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