A forty-year-old man forces a young child to strip down and take a shower. The child screams and cries, but the man persists angily. He then carries the child into his bed. The child pleads, "Help! Mom, make him stop!" The mother yells back, "Just listen to him. He's your father and it's past your bedtime." This is a common night-time routine for parents with their first child

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Why did billy have a frog stapled to his face? Because he was having a bad day.

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A guy reads the bible Another guy shouts "spoiler alert, the main character dies"

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she was clumsy. Nevertheless the accident was minor and she did not injure the arms that she had.

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Q. What did the boy do for his birthday? A. Nothing. His birthday occurred on 9-11.

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What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

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Why was the asian bad at sex? Because he was 5 years old

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why does david stutter during meetings. because he smiles till his cheeks hurt

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Why did Sally fall off the tree? I could explain officer. You see, I was jogging and I was looking for my dog and she went on to me and I told her to stop but she wouldn't listen. I'm innocent I tell you! Innocent!

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What does a vegetarian eat? colored penis

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Roses are black Violets are black I'm Helen Keller Everything's black

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What did the no-arm, no-leg, paraplegic orphan with cancer get for christmas? Pregnant.

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What is worse than waking up by your alarm clock on the weekend? 9/11

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What is pink, red and silver and crawls into walls? A baby with forks in it's eyes

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My Butthole.

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my computer teacher just left the room. teehee JLR

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What is the french word for penis? I cannot say because I do not possess an adequate knowledge of the language.

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How do you make a girl scout cry? Kill her family.

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mikey is cute

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Why was a mother crying at a hospital? Because a bird threw a stick at her five minutes ago.

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A blonde fails an exam because she did not study

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Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? The grass was getting to high and needed to be trimmed.

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why did Sarah fall of the swing... she had no arms Knock Knock.... Whos there .... Not Sarah

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Yo mamma so black, she uses armor all instead of lotion...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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