What did the chicken say to the duck .... Nothing the chickin was Spanish and the duck was illiterate

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I fear I do, maybe someone fooled you, but that was originally one of my aliases.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To rape a duck

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Sugar is sweet. Plums are too. Prison rape isn't funny either.

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Knock knock Who's there? Your mom Oh hi mom

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Chicken

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What do you call your mother's bipolar brother with three arms? Uncle.

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What happened to the blonde who blew out her birthday candles? Her hair caught on fire

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Knock knock: Who's there? Guy in the doghouse. Guy in the doghouse who? WILL YOU LET ME OUT OF HERE?!?

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What do andy and Justin Bieber have in common? they are both 5'7

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a schizophrenic And so am I

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You pour cold water on her head or make a loud noise nearby.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I hi Jacked your car And killed your family

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What do you do when your girlfriend is bleeding? She is probably on her period.

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How many apples do you end up with if your dog is a golden retriever who got raped by a giant scorpion? A jail

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Did you hear about the Irish man that accidently killed himself,he farted in the bath & drowned trying to smell it

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What did michael say to sam? (pedo face) YEH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Guess what? Random shit. Why? Because almost nobody looks at the newest jokes to realize that 99.999% of jokes that just say random shit never get above the 0 mark.

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? One is a bottom-feeding scum sucker, and the other is an advisor who assists people by representing them on legal matters.

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What rhymes with car? Not kangaroo

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A man walks into a bar He wakes up from his coma 21 years later and learns that humans now serve pumpkins as gods.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? a guy who copies antijokes on ant joke.com

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What's bigger than China and Smaller than my penis? Russia and a smaller penis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops