how do you kill a man? slowly saw off all their limbs and then jump up and down on the torso and let all the organs fly out

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room without dinner.

one stop shop

How do you stop a bus? You don't, and Regina George didn't either.

Why did the girl go to the hospital? Her brother dared her to jump off the second story roof of their house...

24

Why couldn't Ariel talk in the Little Mermaid? Someone slit her throat.

A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

A black man and a Mexican are in the back of a car, who's driving? Their father Micheal, he adopted both of them from a mentally handicapped orphanage when they were five.

Mini mouse was brutally killed n Oakland Now Mickey is a Chinese member of the crips in Compton Remember don't forget to see the new Disney movie, Mickey Goes Gang-Bangin

Why did the Little girl fell off the swing? A: Because she had no arms. And why did she fell again? A: Because her parents laugh about it and ride her again.

A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

why should not women able to vote? because their stupid and should not vote at all

What's the difference between a duck and male black prostitute? The duck is says quack

what do you call an anoying ginger? jimmy overby

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a young mother cow died in a street crossing by a large oil truck, she was never buried and became infested with maggots in the next few days

In Soviet Russia, man doesn't walk to the bar. The bar walks to the man!

Why couldn't the Jew get pregnant? Because he was man.

why did the chicken cross the road? he was stapeled to a cow and the cow got hit by a bus so they died.

is it normal to be sexualy atracted to numbers?

What do a fish and an eagle have in common? They both live underwater aside from the eagle.

What did the elephant say to the pelican? He didn't say anything. I lied.

What's puby and dandruffy? Aodhan Hearty

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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