What's green and doesn't fly? A broken green helicopter.

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Why is it so hard to cook vegetables? The wheel chair won't fit in the oven.

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Why is Michael Jackson bad at chess ? Because he is dead.

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Why did the police arrest the black man? He'd committed a crime, and was punished accordingly.

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Wow Nero, you never explained the process, its like I am at the ocean again, but dont lie, you still fear showers... Sorry its just not you when you lie to me, I know I should be more concerned about you, ill bring those old stuff, im tired, sleepy, I suppose thats your work huh Nero? Thanks, call it as a brother or what you want, but I really love you and wont ever stop doing so. Goodnight Nerochan, promise me you will take care of yourself, we all got a long life ahead of us, and I want to spend more time with you, if its fine for you and your wife.

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there are three women witch one is married? the one with the ring on its finger

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How do you know when an Asian has robbed your house? You have informed the police, who in turn searched the house for DNA evidence, eventually leading them to the criminal, who just so happened to be a troubled Asian teenager attempting to join a local gang.

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Two gay guys walk into a bar. You think the second one would notice...

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Why do black people like fried chicken? Well you see....

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Q: Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Getting mauled by a pack of hungry wolves

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nobody move! I've dropped my brain.

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Why did the little girl walk into the wall? Because she was blind.

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Huh, I never succeeded in any of those, and I tried a lot. Please tell me you never gone with something nasty like that...

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A blonde runs into her house. She died in a tragic backdraft fire. Always check to see if the doorknob is warm.

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Two men meet at an office. One man says "why the long face?" Then other man says "I just had plastic surgery."

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A blond, a brunette, and a redhead all entered their designated classrooms to begin AP testing. They all worked extraordinarily hard to earn a passing grade and receive college credit. The brunette and the redhead received passing, yet average, grades. The blond also received a score that reflected the amount of effort she put into studying and memorizing the material, because there is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

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Person1: Have you heard about the girraffe who doesn't eat Georgia peaches? Person2: yes. Person1: Oh, never mind then.

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What's orange and sounds like a parrot? An orange parrot.

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your life

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Yo momma so fat, when she steps on the scales it reads 90kg

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Roses are red, and blood is too. But violets are purple. NOT FUCKING BLUE.

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What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Porn

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Get some flipping new jokes people

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Why did the donkey say "Shit sorry I had no idea" Because the batteries shouted: "Nobody told me about your actions here, sorry for the terrible coding format, I am new"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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