A horse enter a bar, and the barman says: "why the long face?" The horse has cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -5

In the movie, Full Metal Jacket, my favorite part was when the entire platoon beat PVT. Pyle with hard soap while he was tied down. Actually I am lying. That part was extremely cruel.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

why did the koala fall out of the tree? it was shot. why'd the second koala fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first one. why'd the third koala fall out of the tree? it thought they were playing a game. why'd the refrigerator fall out of the tree? it thought it was a koala. why'd the man fall of his bike? it was hit by 3 koala's and a refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A man walks into a convenient store and asks the cashier where the toilet paper is. She says aisle five. He goes down aisle five and there's no toilet paper.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Yo Momma's so fat......... that she should probably start eating healthy and exercising more regularly or else she may be at risk of developing heart disease or diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Dollar ice tea... I drink that Supa hot fire... i spit that Two and a half men................... I watch that

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How many Bedouins do you need to change a light bulb? 2, one is changing the bulb and the second is powering the generator.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Golf.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

If you're American when you go into the bathroom , and you're American when you come out of the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom. Ha, joke is on you because Americans don't pee.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What is older than history?

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Your mom is so old she is significantly more identifiable in a crowd of middle-aged men and women.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

why was the woman silent? she lost the ability to speak in a tragic boating accident in which her vocals chords were damaged thus making it incapable for her to utter anything

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How do you offend a black man? Call him a nigger.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? Someone left the gate open.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Whats worse than 20 dead babies in a garbage can? A: The smell

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He didn't give in to peer pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what did the hammer do on the test -he nailed it.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm going to murder you Did you look behind you?

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what's black, white and doesn't float? the titanic

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Yo momma's so fat, that she got baptised in Sea World.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

why cant black people swim? I dont know but they killed my family

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How long does it take for light to travel a light-year ? A year.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the blonde leave the lamp on while sleeping? Because it helps to see in case you need to get up in the middle of the night. YOU THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO SAY "BECAUSE THEY'RE A LIGHT SLEEPER!" MUAHAHAHAHAHA

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why is Diarreah genetic? It runs in your genes.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops