What gets you a succesful life and career? Swag

Knock knock. Why do you say the words "knock knock" without actually knocking on the door?

what do you say to a woman on her rags? nothing.try and ignore it.you didn't hear this from me and we never talked.

Wanna here a joke? Dylan Shipleys penis!!!

George Lopez never said anything funny in his life.

Why couldnt the pirate get into the movies? Because it was rated pg-13 and his parents didnr likw him watching that

what did Cinderella say when she got to the ball? "Grggglgluglguggarglegerrrllggglge"

Dubstep = a computer with a noisy virus.

Q:What happens when a bug walks into a bar A:It gets stepped on

What do you call a man with leaves on his head? Steve, he's on camouflage training in the Army.

silver bullet?

Why didn't the parachute open? nevermind

Why did the chicken cross the road? How am I supposed to know?

why do girls like grey's anatomy so much? because they are girls

How do you kill a fox? With a gun. How do you kill a deer? With a gun.

What did the mexican say to the other mexican? Lets go get some tacos.

Why was the man shot in the head twice? He wasn't because he died after the first and it is nearly impossible to survive a gunshot to the head.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

How do you know when some one is a complete dick? When they hit the prestige buttom in Black Ops when your taking a dump. N.P.P.

how do you get 20 people in a mini? open the door would be a good start but i dont think they will all fit.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause Magic Johnson has AIDS

Why did lil' Jenny fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Why did a blond killed herself? She couldnt find a corner in a round room.

Why did the elephant fall out of the tree? Because the branch broke.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...