What's the difference between getting hit by a car and being struck by lightning? Impossible to tell, they are 2 entirely different circumstances with limited certainties.

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HALF LIFE 4 COMING OUT SOON!

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9!

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what did the blond say to his mother?? Nothing. He is deaf and has to use sign language.

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Why cant Joe drive his tractor? Because he doesn't have any arms or legs. Why doesn't Joe have any arms or legs? BECAUSE JOE IS A POTATO.

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name one pop artist who's better than Michael Jackson that's really hard. there's so many

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Tim likes girls

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The $5.00 Foot-long at Subway's is actually $5.45 due to tax.

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do you know cadbury choclate buttons? yeah, you know the white ones come out now, do you why? so the black kids can get there face dirty too

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why did you read this anti-joke? because you typed in antijoke on google or have the app on a phone

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Why can't the Asian do math? He has down-syndrome.

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why did the chicken cross the road because he wanted to get to chicken to have safe sex

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Rylan Clark

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Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: A bleeding penguin.

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Regarding the "I will violate you, your children and your parent if you thumb me red" comment belo. I had a green thumb, I know because I gave it to myself because I am awesome... Now I got none... I person that this this, I cannot wait to X-mas where I will be violating them all, tell them, and as thus remind you that this was their Christmas present from you... Your friendly r*pist neighborhood Moral Man: Yes, I am your neigbor... I cant wait for slot number 24 on my christmas calendar... There is a picture of you and your family... Yummy!

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What happened when Tim's house caught on fire? The fire department was contacted and they put the fire out.

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A rooster lays an egg on top of a henhouse. Which way does the egg fall? Roosters don't lay eggs.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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A black man takes a girl home from a nightclub. She says "Show me it's true what they say about black men". So he reveals a big penis and they have sex there and then.

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Nero? You are alive? Holy shit! You are like so my hero! I love you man! I was so saddened to hear you where tortured and killed, but then I read about this "Axel Knight" and hoped it was you, it sure sounded like you! Please tell me its no joke, you are a hero around these parts, and we really miss you, honestly sir, is it true point zero has become some sort of utopia or are the painkillers making you a bit Hazy? I am Erica by the way, still with the order, but what is this about your empire?

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What do you get when two black men walk into a bar? A few salesmen celebrating their recent pay raise.

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Why did the shark eat the girl? Because she was ugly

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Knock Knock. Who's there? ........ It turns out it was Helen Keller.

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Q:Why did the old man die? A:Because he had Cancer in his hole body.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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