Bob has 80 chocolate bars, he gives 5 to his uncle,10 to his mother and 8 to his freind. He then eats 40 chocolate bars. Q. How many chocolate bars has bob got left now? A. Bob has no chocolate bars left. Shortly after Bob ate 40 bars he was diagnosed with diabetes. He then died of a heart attack due to high cholesterol.

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Why do Mexicans stink? Because they're Mexican.

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Q: What's worse than a worm in you're apple... A: The fact that you have all-timers and can't remember...

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Q: What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Pfft. Stupid. Apples are for healthy people. Go for the ice cream. There's no worms in that.

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How do you get a black guy down from your tree? You can't, because there aint any.

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what do you call the breaching of the anal cavity with a penis? butt sex

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friends are like snowflakes. if you piss on them they go away

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Whats black,white and red all over? A penguin in a blender

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Tie her down and plant a bamboo seed under her.

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Johnny Manziel is the best quarter ever (this isn't a joke just a true statement)

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what do you do when you see a black man punching a girl? act like you dont see it and get the hell out of harms way

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Q: Why couldn' the muslim eat pork? A: Because he had been raped and killed by a giant scorpion.

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whts worse than finding a worm in your apple? butt sex with the devil

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Why didn't the cat play with the ball of yarn? It was drowned in a toilet.

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Why did the girl throw the clock out of the window? The clock was broken, and it was the only valuable object in her possession.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who let out the chicken?

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Q. What did the barber say to the Italian kid? A. Do you want your hair cut or should I just change the oil.?

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Man: You know you're crazy when you talk to inanimate objects, you know you're Insane when they reply. Stick: I know, right?

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Add William Wright on facebook Answer-www.facebook.com/public/William-Wright

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Q: What's worse than a pile of dead babies? A: The live one at the bottom trying to eat his way out. Q: What's worse than that? A: When he comes back for more.

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You know what's funny? A well told joke

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How do you make time fly? You can't, time is the duration of events and therefore cannot "fly".

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Most likely for no discernible reason as chickens are animals with poor reasoning skills.

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Your mam is so fat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops