Why did a chicken cross the road? To see The Doors.

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Whats pink red and silver? A baby chewing on reason blades. Whats pink red silver and smells bad? Same baby two weeks later.

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:( You are right Nero, I am terribly sorry, when I see you, I see the brightest man I have ever seen, should you ever turn against me and stop underestimating yourself, there is nothing I could do.

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A fat black guy walks into a pet store and asks if he can have a chicken. The cashier says "what do you want a chicken for?" He says " I need to lose weight so I'm hoping to eat its all natural eggs" So the cashier gives him the chicken and the fat black guy lost 50 pounds.

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Why did the blonde ask her doctor if she could get a new butt? She is insecure about its appearance and believes reconstructive anus surgery is the only solution.

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"CHOCOLATE!!!!!!!!" -Spongebob

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What's bigger than a breadbox? Whitney Houston's coffin.

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What did the rabbit buy the Jewish duck for Hanukkah? Nothing, animals don't celebrate holidays.

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What would happen if the whole world farted at once?

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What do you call a guy with aids? Your dad

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Pandas Everywhere!!!

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What happen when Sarah made but her nose in other people's business? Her vagina got set on fire by cole and derrek shoved your head up his ass!

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Have you heard of that new jewish car? No, have you? No.

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What did one theoretical physicist say to another theoretical physicist? Hey there Bill, how's Nancy and the kids doing?

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A man goes to the doctor and complains: "Doctor, my Viagra hasn't worn off! It's been over eight hours!" The doctor replies "You were bitten by a banana spider. You have one day to live.

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Why did the man walk instead of taking the bus? Because he felt like getting a heathy workout.

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A horse walks into a bar The bartender says "why the long face?" The horse says nothing, because he's a horse The bartender soon relizes there is a horse in his bar, and calls animal control

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Why won't Santa be delivering presents this year? Because he can't be bothered.

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Q: What did they call the dude who was stuck on a deserted island? A: Incontinent.

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What happened to the little girl who fell into the lake? She was rescued and made a complete recovery.

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Billy wanted a toy for Christmas. Sadly, Billy died before Christmas.

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Mum, "Why aren't you listening to me, are you deaf or something?" Son, (Silence)...

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A goose walks into a bar. Maybe he should have ducked.

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Brett Favre sent me a pic of his penis. I then compared it to my own and felt good about my general ackage size

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops