Why did children rejoice when Michael Jackson died? Because they were at a birthday party, and only heard about his death afterward.

What'd the mexican get for his birthday, birthday cards from his friends and family.

So I was walking down the road today

What is square, brown, and smells funny? A box with a dead body in it.

life is like a penis, short but feels long when it's hard.

What did the penguin do in the desert? Die.

What do you call a yelling, enraged Asian man? A fucking asshole.

How do you make a retard make a sound like a dog? Douse him in gasoline and light him on fire. WOOF!

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a screaming goat

An asian woman was driving along the freeway one day when a police officer pulled her over and arrested her, The officer arrested her because she had killed her husband 5 years ago and she thought she had gotten away with it.

Where's the soap?

What's funny about your mom? Nothing, she died three weeks ago.

Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, Bushes are red, HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!

Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Ok good, just checking. It would be a shame for your perishable foodstuffs to go bad.

meatspin.fr

why was the old man on the ground he fell

Q: What's purple and flies? A: Super Grape

What did the man say when he lost his car? Where the fuck did my car go

A deaf lion tried to kill a zebra. It succeeded.

Why was little David sad? His father got hit by a truck.

There was once a family of tomatoes. A daddy tomato a mommy tomato and a baby tomato. they decided one day to take a walk. but the baby was taking forever so the daddy tomato walked back STOMPED on him and yelled "CATCHUP"

Q:Why did the little girl jump in the pool and drown? A:because she didn't know how to swim

If Waldo and Carmen Sandiego had a child it would be fictional.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Being unaware of his surroundings, the chicken was startled by an oncoming motor vehicle. Due to the animals vapid logic an reasoning, based on impulse it quickly ran to the other side of the street to avoid its imminent death by the speeding automobile. Unknowingly, the chicken had reached the other side of the road,

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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