The new Minons film reminds me of most foreign films.. You can't undertand a fucking word they say and they're all yellow

A Scotsman, an Irishman and an Englishman walk into a bar... They enjoy their drinks and leave.

A Jew,Spiderman and The Incredible Hulk all jump off the top of the Empire State Building,who hits the ground first? The Jew because the other two dont exist

A paralyzed person walks into a bar.

Knock Knock Who's there? The IRS. You've been convicted of tax evasion.

What do you call a cold chicken? A Raw Chicken.

There are two muffins in an oven. Since they are inanimate objects, they do nothing but sit there and bake until they are a golden brown color, at which point a man takes them out of the oven and eats them for breakfast.

Q. How does Michael Jackson pick his nose? A. From a catalogue.

Q: what's green and fluffy? A: green fluff

What is rainbow-colored, makes no sounds, and smells like a banana? A rainbow-colored banana

Why is Skrillex so bad a fishing? He has Parkinson's Disease

Whats funnier than a guy in a wheelchair? A guy on the floor squirming to get back in his wheelchair.

Q.Why did the dinosaur cross the road? A.Because chickens weren't invented then.

My grandma told me to always keep my head up and just keep going. She fell down a manhole last week and died.

knock knock whos there i have Alzheimer's I have Alzheimer's who Cream cheese

What do you call a college student who never studies? An irresponsible person

How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way. ernkso

What did one wall say to the other? Nothing. Walls can't talk.

What did the dealer say to the addict? Sup.

An alligator walks into a bar. The bar tender calls animal control and calmly escorts everyone out the back door.

how do you poke a chinese person in the eye? with a credit card!

What does it mean when your dog goes to the bathroom on your floor? He hasn't been very well potty trained By: robobob123

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because a black man was chasing his dinner.

Who do you call when you see a ghost on the street? GHOSTBUSTERS!!!! no, ghostbusters are not real, you call the police

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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