What did the crazy asian man say just before he died? He didn't say anything- he was in an 18 month long coma due to a brain stem stroke. He left behind a wife, a 3 year old daughter and a newborn son.

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Why did the housewife become a farmer? Because the kitchen was burned down in a horrific accident.

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How do you drown a dumb blonde? Hold her underwater.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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A black man a mexican and a caucasian were walking together. The black man and the mexican walked into a bar. The caucasian ducked. Not because his race makes him smarter in anyway, but because his friends shouted out a warning to him. All three then proceeded to the nearest pub.

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What's the difference between a 7 year old boy and a 50 year old man? Hair.

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Q: why is there always a window in front of the kitchen sink A: so when the woman is washing the dishes she can see the grass she is about to cut

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What is x + 12 That is impossible because you can't add letters

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what did the captcha response say to the man? ofdorno which.

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So a magician was droving down the road and then he turned into a driveway!

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What goes up and down but never physically moves? My grade.

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Two penguins, sitting in a bath tub. One says, "Pass the soap!" The other says, "What do you think I am?! A clock?"

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How do you attach a nipple tassle to a purple honey badger? Refridgerator

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Why did Logan lose his lunch? Because he forgot to his lunchbox on the day-trip.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, these two statement are obvious unless you are color blind

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Why was the homeless man homeless? He lost his house in a terrible house fire, stretching throughout his apartment building, losing his much beloved wife and kids in the horrific accident.

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João Duarte reads this.

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Why did the chicken fall down? Because it wanted to have fun

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Q:When a T- Rex walks into your house what does it mean? A: Your on pot, T-rex's are extinct

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What do you call a flat-chested woman with a penis? A man.

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How do you trick the devil? You give him a ginger.

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Yo mama got so bad teeth her dentist said she should get them surgicly removed and get lifelike dentures

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What did the man say when an pterodactyl flew into the kitchen while he was having breakfast? Huh, that's strange.

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Q: What did the pedestrian say to the bus driver that hit him? A: Nothing, he died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops